Non-Jews are for practice
I'm good, just tired from chardonnay and giving hand jobs.
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
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