I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
Randomize
