Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
This is a test of Andrews drunk texting, had this been an actual drunk text, all the words would be spelled incorrectly and would be missing key verbs and nouns, followed by a request to not get fired.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
Randomize