Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
Houston, we have a squirter
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..