i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
Sweating vodka and spray tan, I feel like a trophy wife.
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
Randomize
