i was rollin on her like bob the builder
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
After my mom met Tanner, she literally turned and said "he's from old money, top of his class at Emory, already has doctors courting him for jobs and judging from your vocal performance the other night, he's gifted in bed. Fake a pregnancy right now"
I come from her. Holy hell.
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
Randomize
