Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
So it turns out there are pros and cons to having a broken wrist. Pro: I can give amazing blowjobs with my left hand. Con: I just had to open a packet of crisps with scissors.
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
I FOUND THE LEGS
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
Randomize
