oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
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