After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
I'm drunk, laying in bed, eating macaroni salad. I dropped a piece and tried to pick it up with a fork. My cleavage is bleeding and I haven't been laid yet. Heeeyyyy!!!
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
well, you know. whores of a feather.
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
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