At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Randomize
