Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
She took me to ER. She says thought it was a squirtgun filled with vodka and she was 'marking me for later.' Thank god it's a flesh wound, and we're cool and going to date.
gtg, the cops are here
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
Randomize