i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
After tacos, we're chasing women.
The fact that the praying hands are in my top emojis defines how 2016 is going so far
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
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