Sry I called you an 8
May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
Randomize