I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
Randomize
