K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
My new years resolution is going to be to stop drunk snapchatting old hook ups asking them when we're going to bang again
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
Note to self: dont wear a butt plug for several hours and then go gym and try and do squats
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
