I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
I have two bottles of emergency tequila stashed under my desk at work.
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
Randomize
