And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
You ever fart so bad at work that you think about taking a sick day just to spare your coworkers from the savage olfactory beating they are about to receive?
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
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