I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
I sometimes forget that turkeys are alive even when its not Thanksgiving.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found a beer bottle in my xmas tree while disassembling it. God, I'm going to miss the holidays.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
They knew I had a party because the refrigerator settings were different, but they don't notice that we installed a new toilet seat so it's okay.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
You WHAT?!?!
Paid. A. Homeless. Guy. To. Throw. A. Drink. In. Her. Face.
I fucking love you.
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