So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
Aiming to get laid tonight but if it falls thru I'm either gonna make a mixtape for my sugar daddy or sew a teddy bear for his newborn
Randomize
