It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
He better not be in your backpack
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
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