I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
I'm pretty sure I broke my breathalyzer by breathing vaporized vodka into it.
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
Randomize