called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
His second form of ID was an emergency room wristband from an hour ago. What the fuck is going on right now
Haha yeah he had an allergic reaction to the alcohol earlier. He thinks that if he only drinks vodka he will be ok...
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
The cop busted in, made the music stop, and goes "GUYS LISTEN UP! DRINK, DO DRUGS, HAVE UNPROTECTED SEX, I DONT GIVE A FUCK, JUST QUIET DOWN!" Best. Cop. Ever.
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
Randomize
