Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
So I just chugged the rest of the wine in my mug so I would have something to eat my corn flakes in. With a plastic fork. I need a dishwasher
And maybe a life coach?
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
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