i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
Randomize
