Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
Partial kegs from last night are currently in my bathtub, which leads me to 2 questions: 1. What are you doing tonight? 2. Can I use your shower?
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
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