I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
Floor bacon is actually really good
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
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