we have officially lost it.
I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
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