Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
We tried to make a sex tape, but we were hammered and she forgot to take the cap off the camera. Somebody starts snoring 10 minutes in.
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
I have post one night stand depression
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
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