you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
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