her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
I'm at the gas station where we got beef jerky and condoms. The fact that those two are in the same sentence makes me love you more.
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
I think I deserve an award for the breakup text I sent him. Like a pulitzer prize or a donut or something.
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
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