You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
where are my eyebrows?
Guys I ate pizza off the fucking ground of the cab. I am the worst type of person
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
Randomize
