You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
i awoke yet another morning with penis breath. ive been so generous santa has to bring me a shit ton of presents
He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
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