Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
And then he peed in my hair
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize