her voice is like 435,765 daggers being simultaneously twisted into my eardrum
i'd rather just be hit by a car than answer her phone calls
I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
kristin has been a bad kristin
I was born with a shot glass in my hand
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
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