Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
You were wearing a sombrero. And a crown. And told me to use the nerf gun to protect your room from the cat. You don't have a cat.
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
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