i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
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