It wouldn't matter if you are Jesus Christ himself, you are not getting into the bar tonight
i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
Everytime she tries to call me all I can think about is when she tripped walking down my steps during her walk of shame. Then I laugh until it goes to voicemail
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
Randomize
