Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
Just woke up on a dolphin floaty wearing only a party hat. There's blood on the side of the pool and glass in the sauna. Worst fucking hangover. But some guy said he is making crepes so its ok
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
A young (I'm going to guess late middle school age) kid shouted at me from the crosswalk GAS PUMP OF SHAME! I have peaked in life.
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
Randomize
