I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
They are going to name an STD after you.
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
Randomize
