Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
went to the bathroom to piss, saw puke in the toilet thought wtf i dont remember puking, then turned around to find a chick i've never seen before passed out in my shower.
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
I accidentally sent him a snapchat of my boobs and now we're going on a date tomorrow... Could be worse.
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
My night has consisted of googling cat penises and creating a Tinder profile.
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
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