she was so not down for the gang bang
was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
Can someone please explain where the fish in the mason jar came from when we were at a bar all night?
You told the bartender if he gave you one of the fish you'd go away
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently nothing brings out sympathy in a barista like asking if they have a hangover special
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
Hypothetically speaking...if I was arrested in Wisconsin, say Kenosha county, would you post my bail all the way from Oregon? If yes, will you also accept my collect call in t-minus 13 hours?
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
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