I fucked a guy named chris tucker last night
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
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