Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He googled the address of the bar, then sent me a text saying "6.3 miles. Too far. :( Apparently I am only worth a 5 mile radius.
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
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