well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
Randomize
