I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
I thought the Bane mask would really repel dudes but instead I ended up grinding on a frat dude that whispered "bad bitch contest, you in first place" in my ear in a Batman voice
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
