IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
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