It's Friday. Sex?
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
Randomize
