I considered driving home in his mom's bathrobe until i realized i'd have to stop to buy cigarettes
If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
when I woke up she was standing in the living room with a bottle of scotch because she is "allergic to hangovers"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
she hid the dish soap because she was afraid someone would confuse it with the margaritas and drink it instead. her reasoning was "theyre both soo pink...i cant tell them apart"
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
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