Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
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