Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
You know you're too drunk when you start calling people out for unfollowing you on social networks.
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
Also, apparently I'm only coherent when I'm drunk sexting. And then I'm grammatically perfect and impressively eloquent.
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
Randomize
